Pain is not a cage but a soil

I have known pain my whole life. Oftentimes, physical and mental pain have walked hand in hand. One comes with the other; one makes the other worse. But pain is not a cage. It’s a soil for transformation and compassion. You learn to see the world differently, but it’s in your hands to decide which lens you want to look through.

Like everything that comes into our lives, pain is a teacher if we just stop and listen. It allows us to go into the depths of ourselves – our identity, our fears and doubts. It shapes us again and again – sometimes by ripping us apart and leaving us to sew ourselves back together piece by piece, and other times slowly over time, like a flowing water shapes a rock.

It teaches us to see and appreciate the things we have in our lives. The pain can open doors for gratitude to flow in if we let it. Gratitude is a grounding force to let go of the past and be hopeful of the future. It acts as a shield against the grudge and hate that one often feels when in pain. It gives us understanding not only for ourselves but also for others. It makes us realize what kind of invisible burdens others might be carrying.

If we let our pain blind us and lead us into the path of bitterness, it will cage us. It will be directed outwards and hurt others the same way we, ourselves, are hurting. However, by listening to our pain, we can find compassion and new paths to follow. Pain is not an obstacle; it’s a redirection. But if we don’t allow ourselves to broaden our view, change our perception, we’ll stay stuck. Often, we won’t be able to change the situation, fix the problem, or remove the obstacle, so we need to adapt and find a new way. And often we’ll find something even better, something we weren’t able to see before. Pain can be a soil for something new.

When I got sick, I needed to change my entire life. I needed to learn a slower way of living and shift my perception. I couldn’t change my situation, but I could adapt to it. By living slower and more intentionally, I started to see joy in little things. Be grateful for the things I had left after losing so much.

My new life often felt like disappointment after disappointment. I wasn’t able to do the things I loved anymore. But slowly, with gratitude, I grew roots into the soil created by my illness. Even if I got better now, I wouldn’t go back to how I was before.